Forum - RE: Gano-Soup Experience of MintZhi - red and blue knees - 2

Actually that hot feeling is spreading through my body again. I've not had my soup yet -slept today - it's cooking now!!!

My body gets hotter and hotter and parts of my body are really wet!!!

I'll keep on having the soup, Ganoderma powder, spirulina and cranberry juice. I'll consume nothing raw or cold. Please let me know if and when I need do anything

Wow what a caring and diligent 'busy little bee ' you are LingZhi!!!!! 6:40 on a Sunday morning

LingZhi I wrote here for over an hour - had the courage to share things hard to share - and it all disappeared!! Hours ago. Only able now to tell you - so disappointing!!! I can't write all that again - not now anyway.

I'll lie down because I've just had my soup and reishi.

Thx again. I don't know when I'll be up to writing that again. Let's see!
Warm hug x

Ok. Allow me to write at least something. I'm very weak. Very shaky. Trembling and crying. My lower back hurts. I feel like I want to curl up in a ball - but I don't really want to do that. I want to be strong and well and happy and back in life!!!!!! And here I am a crying shaking weak mess!!

Why? A friend sent me a video clip that shows how someone who was sexually abused has been helped. But it's brought up all horrible feelings. I feel so helpless. I want to swear - these bastards - but then I feel guilty for using a bad word. But I hate them. I'd love to kill all paedophiles. They fuck people up - and a lot of people. I wish I could get angry but I get desperately sad weak and trembly instead. Deep deep sadness.

I'm 60. When I was 16 We were going on holiday but I suddenly felt funny in my head, swooned then started screaming, thrashing about (I'm really hot now and sweating everywhere) and was rushed into hospital. I was an extremely happy loved and loving girl. I learned later that because I WAS strong enough I was trying to get rid of memories but couldn't (for reasons I won't go into here - all theories!!!). I had many many of these 'do's' as I called them (anfälle) until I had my first baby when I was 20 - then I didn't have any 'do's' for about 10 years. However I very often had the horrible horrible funny feeling in my head and either talking to or being talked to by my ex- husband - the feeling would go!!!! I often had the feeling and didn't need to talk. I always carried a heavy weight around with me not knowing what it was. No-one would ever know - I was happy positive fun etc loved my family friends life - but this shadow was a nuisance to say the least.

Then when my 4th child was very little I got lumbago and couldn't move. Then I felt really really funny again and literally crawled to my doctor where I collapsed. She injected me with calcium. She wanted me to go for rehabilitation but my ex husband wouldn't let me go. I was bedridden. A heilpraktiker gave me vit b injections. But it was with utter willpower that I got back on my feet.

Then we moved to Canada. My ex husband was a controller. He saved me in the beginning and nearly killed me in the end. I can't explain everything - too much - be a good film!!!!!!!

He brought my youngest sister and her baby out to see us in Canada. He wouldn't let us stay in England until the baby was born. One of the very few times in my life when I was angry. It was a surprise but I wasn't strong and I collapsed. She was very sick (she died when she was 38) so I took her to a kinesiologist.

However whilst we were there I felt very funny. I went to put cold water on my face. But I felt terror and started screaming like I've never screamed before. I collapsed of course. The kinesiologist of course worked on me and that's the first time I knew that as a young child I was severely damaged not only sexually but through the occult.

That's why my doctor wanted to hypnotize me when I was a very little girl. Of course my mum didn't let him. He knew something was seriously wrong with/for me.

This kinesiologist said she'd never prayed for anyone like she prayed for me. She didn't know whether I would live. I had early leukemia and a host of other things. I could look after my family but apart from that I could do nothing. But I lived. I healed well enough!!

Then we returned to Germany. My ex husband was even more controlling and he had me a shaking mess. He didn't want me getting any help from anyone else but him. But he couldn't help me. Then he got nasty with me.

From this time on - 17???? Years ago - I've had to get some kind of help every few months to be able to keep going. EMDR (rapid eye movement for trauma) oh - hundreds of things. I've had many many extremely severe 'do's' - in between people think I'm perfectly ok!!!!!!!!!! I'm strong. And courageous. And have had good help.

After I took care of my wonderful dear mum and dad I moved to Berlin to be near two of my children. They are gone - one divorced and the other because of his work. BUT I've found the best help for me. That's why I'm here.

Two years ago I had a few MASSIVE do's. Very very frightening for onlookers. Pulling terrifying faces. Running in the air. In absolute terror. Screaming and crying etc. Etc. I ended up in hospital and after that these do' s and collapsing were almost a daily occurrence. I would resort back to being a child - in action and my voice. Very scary for a friend who looked after me.

I was treated for months by going on a special machine in Frankfurt. That managed the do's. I went weekly on one in Berlin.

Then I got amazing help from someone who does Matrix Reimprinting. Oh my word. That helped with panic I didn't even believe one could feel. After I had over a dozen face to face sessions ( because I would either have a do or space out and couldn't come back to the here and now) - I had many sessions on Skype. It helped enormously but something was missing.

I was then contacted by someone who specialized in my particular problem. She helps people who have been damaged by the occult - in many cases as in mine - special programmes are used to hinder being free from the perpetrators. They are cruel terrifying and of course involve lots of sexual abuse and torture. I am so so so so so blessed and grateful to have been helped by these wonderful people.

Of course I'm also on my own with this. Who can I talk to about it. No one could believe what happened. I don't want to talk about it.

I look normal. So people when they see me think I can do normal things. So of course I feel guilty. I'm afraid of seeing people in everyday situations and being critical of me. I know the problem is with me. I feel apologetic to my friends and family that I'm STILL not well. I feel useless. I don't have the energy to mix with people - though I enjoy some interaction with strangers and especially babies and little ones when I'm traveling. I feel embarrassed that I'm still not ok when certain people think I am. My son in law for example. He thinks I'm wonderful and can't see anything wrong with me. That makes me sweat cos I feel obliged to push myself but it's too much or I don't push myself and I feel lazy guilty etc.

I can't bear hearing babies and children cry!!!! Not because of the noise. It makes my body tense up because I don't know whether they are being hurt or not. Again I feel so helpless to help them. I couldn't help or protect my sister and I can't help or protect people now.

I can't watch the news. I get extremely upset and can't cope. These poor asylum seekers for example. When a woman crèche manager was sexually abusing the children I literally wanted to die. I couldn't cope. I had to throw it onto god cos how can you just die. I never want to kill myself but very often I would have liked to press a switch and sleep. However my love for life and the help I get keeps me going.

I'm not going to read all this because I lost it all last time. So I hope it makes sense!!! Anyone who knows me please don't tell anyone else about my experience. I'm writing this here because I want the right help not because I want to tell about this. I'm not proud of it and neither am I interested in it. I just want to be back in life.

If I can listen to someone with a similar problem to validate them or help in anyway that would be ok of course. Otherwise this is information for selfish purposes only - to get well.

May I thank Ganoderma LingZhi and Dr Lim. Please don't underestimate your help - you are helping to save my life. If I don't get the right help from all my helpers I'm finished. Of course I have faith in us altogether x x thank you x

Sorry I forgot something!! Might be important.

I go for Grinberg Methode treatments. Works on the body mind including feelings memories etc.

Apart from one or two flashbacks my memories are body memories - from a tiny baby to 3 years old.


Several weeks ago I sat on the plinth - back supported. He asked me how my legs were. I said fine - relaxed. Really??? Yep!!

He picked my right leg up. Bent it circled it put it down. After 2 nod time - I DID notice a difference. It WAS more relaxed than the other. "Ok let's work he said"

He massaged one leg. All ok. Think he was surprised. BUT as he started on the other leg the most terrifying feeling of panic came up "I want my mum. I want my mum. I want my mum. " I cried.

"Could your mum protect you". "No no but I want my mum she's dead but I want my mum". I was terrified. In a real panic. " ok now breathe like you told me you breathe when you feel scared and tense all your muscles then release the tension". I did!!! I came back to normal!!!

What he demonstrated to me is that the tension that I always have in my body - not only in my neck shoulders back but everywhere - is my body's survival instinct at work - it protects me from always feeling terrified. Lifelong!!!

Wow!! Thank you my wonderful body for helping me to survive but now let's let it go. After two years of the most amazing help my physical body needs the right help in letting go!!!

I hope LingZhi and dear Dr. Lim and Ganoderma that you can please help me with this. I do a lot of relaxing and breathing exercises etc. but my little bod is solid!!!!!! I'm sure the reisha and soup and whatever else will give my body the support or help it needs to relax and enjoy life again.

My wonderful therapist is on holiday for another two weeks. She said my body needs to process all the work we've done. I'm so pleased Ganoderma told me about the wonderful mushroom and soup and about the forum and LingZhi and Dr. Lim. Thank you - you're all helping my process.

Don't we always owe friendliness and kindness to everyone. We never know what people are dealing with do we even when they look 'normal' :)

Please be assured - I will!!!

I do a lot for myself. Thats why I'm still here!!! That's why this additional strengthening of my body with nutrients is so welcome. It couldn't be enough on its own but will do a lot!!!

I've always been active but this last nearly two years I've been mainly inside so I know my lymph will be sluggish etc. I couldn't do much exercise at home this last six months because of my painful shoulder/arm. Ha ha - you have to laugh a bit. But I am doing really well. A lot better than 2 years ago!!!! Just struggling to be back in normal life. Patience and coming at the problem from all different angles!!! I LOVE my soup x x thank you x

Hello dear LingZhi :)

I'm sorry that I've been absent and I really thank you for you care and concern :)

Oh yes - I LOVE my Gano soup with Ganoderma powder - I take spirulina and cranberry juice too.

I've been taking it before I go to bed rather than earlier in the day. Seems to help my painful shoulder and sleeping - somewhat anyway!!! Hope that's ok. I presume one cup per day with a small spoonful of powder is enough!!!

I needed to let you know some of my story so that I get the right help and support. However when I talk about it - it makes me feel worse - I think I'm kind of hiding away from you - for some stupid reason!!!!!! My therapist has been away for THREE weeks!!!! From 2 treatments per week for months and each treatment several hours - to nothing - well the body has been processing the work we've done!!! That's quite hard. Anyway she's back now so I hope I'll be able to have a few more treatments now.

Ok how do I feel. I keep being SO hot!!! Boiling hot - sometimes water runs down me. One day last week - I was dressed warmly enough - I hadn't slept for so long I was so tired - I lay down but I was SO cold - even with a blanket on me. In the end I got up and went out. On the tram I was boiling hot. My body temperature never seems 'normal' - well I'm sure it is sometimes. But very often - and in the night and when I wake up my body is SO hot!!

If I think about how I feel - I cry!!!!!

I'm really tired. Partly I'm sure to do with this shoulder problem. It's so painful when I lie down so my sleep is disturbed. I have to have an MRT :(

I had a visitor today who stayed overnight - it was very nice. But I seem to use so much energy up just having a normal visit with people I'm exhausted afterwards.

In my feelings I feel lost, out of society in the main. I can visit with a few people, food shop, pick up letters from a postbox for someone. But that's about it. Two weeks ago I had a visitor. When she was a little girl her mum died and I looked after her and her brother for a while. We are still close :). However - I was shocked when the three friends she travelled with came up to my flat to help her with her bags and to say hello. When I got over the shock - I enjoyed their company. On the Sunday she suddenly said -"they are out of their lodgings now" and they wanted to come to us!!! I cried. I shook. How stupid!! I got dressed. Made the bed. Tidied a few things away. But in the end they came just in time to pick her up. It was awful!! I couldn't cope with thinking about them coming!!!! When they actually got here I loved them being here and could have chatted and made coffee. I just find normal interaction SO difficult which is not my natural personality. Feel somewhat alone - though I function better more or less alone at the moment!!!

I sometimes just feel " I just can't do it anymore". But you have to!!!!!

I'm losing SO much hair still. And it's drier than usual!!

I've always been slim - never had to watch my weight. Though I don't eat as much as I did I've put quite a lot of weight on - my tummy feels big and I'm 'flabby'. Probably to do with my metabolism??!!! ! I'm not too worried about this - just trying to think what to tell you. What's important.

I used to have - I can't remember what it's called - neuralgia - trigeminal - or something!!! Left side upper jaw facial nerve pain. I had a nerve removed and a root filling. But sometimes I feel the nerve vibration without the intense pain - uncomfortable and strange!!

Am chewing and picking my skin from around my nails like crazy!!!!

Right now - ich habe kein lust- will einfach hinsitzen and nights tun!!!! So that's what I'll do!!

Sorry to be so negative. I feel ok enough. I have hope I'll improve:). :). I hope to feel much better soon then possibly be free to either move to my family ??????? or visit them. I'm not fit to work so it's a bit of a challenge. Ha ha - life never boring. I'm grateful for the help I'm getting.

Thank you all of you :)

Dear, dear Ganoderma (and her lovely husband) are so patient with me and she is so generous with her help and time. She helped me yesterday with my tongue picture and pulse taking. I've just seen it on the forum - so I must do my part now and relate my symptoms!!!!

I need to say - for whatever reason - that I'm not complaining here - I just need you to know my symptoms so that I get the accurate help I need and appreciate - to get well and back in life!!!

And thank you LingZhi for your precious care and help.

And thank you Dr Lim for your wisdom, products, guidance and all your help.

I'm really tired!!! I have very broken sleep. I took a pain killer (I avoid that utterly unless I'm desperate!!) around 4am. I had strong dreams about moving house - one house I was showing someone was empty and ok but what a shock when I went into the next!!! I was so shocked to see a corner of the room full of furniture, made bed in yellow etc - I said "oh No - I have another days work" and in my dream I felt weak and disappointed I wasn't finished. In the next room my mum and dad were in bed ( they have both died) and a baby was kicking around in a drawer!! I just closed the door on them - privacy!!

When I woke up - I was awake - but I wasn't!!! My breathing is STILL like I'm asleep. It's nearly 12 midday. So I'm resting til my body wants to wake up properly.

Yesterday I went to Ganoderma. An improvement - I was able to text her and go to her straight away. The first time I went it took me a week to pick up courage to text her and took all my courage and strength to go to her. I was really anxious!!!

I need to shop for a gift for my daughters - but I can't. I'm very limited in what I can do socially.

At Ganoderma's I had a DXN cream coffee with Ganoderma mushroom in it. Afterwards the heat built up - first in my upper body - a damp heat all over with pools of water here and there. Then in my lower body. A strange heat. As though I had put tiger balm on my body - a cold feeling of heat. That lasted hours!!! Then I went really cold but then really hot everywhere.

Goodness I can't remember anything else. That's all for now. Memory fails!! Sorry.

Oh - I went to Ganoderma because I never got a consistent pulse!! She found it the same. Sometimes we couldn't find anything then a strong pulse then it was gone then weak!!!!! We recorded what we found most often. It was weird!!!

Right now it's like I can't breathe easily and my heart is racing. My throat feels very very tight!!! Maybe I'm processing events that happened when I was little. I feel weak particularly in my lower back and spreading into my legs and particularly to my knees. I don't feel scared though!!!

My shoulder is still very painful though I'm having excellent help for it!!!

That's all for now folks :)

Im just Reading Torga's experience. I understand most of the German!!! Surprised!!!

She reminded me that I also have strange feelings in my eyes. A feeling I need to close them or change the direction I'm looking in - a muscle tiredness, sometimes I can't look at who I'm talking too it's such hard work for my eyes. It's strange to feel 'conscious' of your eyes. I have a cold feeling in them. Sometimes dry. Probably liver.

Ha ha - such a winger ( complainer) - I have tinnitus in my left ear - for years. I hear it mainly when it's quiet. It's a high pitched whistle noise. I can hear but since childhood have found it difficult to decipher words - very rarely can I decipher words in songs - but I can hear. Strange. Was always having my ears tested as a child ( can't remember why) - but nothing wrong was ever found!!!

I've remembered something else!!

I've never been a person who had body odor!! Very occasionally a sweet sour underarm "perfume";/

Over the last few weeks on a few occasions I HAD to shower because I had a strange unpleasant body smell!!

I'm not ill but I keep having coughing spells. Dry coughing.

I still feel like my body is holding water and isn't ridding itself of what it should be. I've never had cellulite but around my waist it looks like cottage cheese- yuck - help!!! Ha ha :)

I'm sorry I haven't said thank you before but this wonderful info only appeared on my tablet very late last night:/

Anyway - thank you very much for your care, interest and guidance!!!

I slept last night!!! I went to bed late - shortly before 1 and I slept immediately and until 8:22!!! It took a few minutes this morning before my body heated up and sweated but wasn't as extreme as usual!!!

I feel extremely nervous this morning. I feel restless and alone and bored (I NEVER feel bored normally). I had another HUGE session with my therapist on Tuesday which addressed very deeply a programming in me which forbade me to live -either to die or to be like the 'living dead' (which is basically what I am :/). The experiences I've survived as a child are unbelievable and evil. That's all I want to say (don't want to but I think it's important to say this). I feel very very fortunate to have help for the psyche or whatever it is, for my shoulder from a good therapist and nutritional help from you guys to help the organs and body in general to also recover and be strengthened. Maybe this is my year!!!!! I sure hope so!!!!!

I'm SO nervous!!! I'll eat. Then do a few jobs slowly and methodically. I might be able to have a session this afternoon!!! BUT I slept - yeah!!!!
I'll ask Ganoderma about the heat of the oven and then I'll make my new soup today.

Thank you all :)
Gratefully yours - MintZhi